Coil
by RoseGoldExile
Summary: Without the wall, I could see him for who he truly was. An immortal soul with a timeless lust for life and a thirst for the thrill. The rest of us held ourselves down with the morals given to us by our fathers, but Damon had no such qualms. He was flexible in his views and his morals varied. Most of all, he was more honest than any of us. And even though I knew better, I loved him.
1. The Return

**A/N: A lot of the time when I have a block, it's because I have so many ideas running through my head. This particular idea just happened to be turned into a story. **

**Buckle up kids.**

**Chapter One: The Return**

Death wasn't a peaceful thing. It wasn't the letting go that everyone made it out to be, and it definitely wasn't the resigned sacrifice that movies and television and all that other bullshit tried to convince you of. Death, having actually witnessed it just minutes ago, was a slip and a fall right out of life. I tried to remember the last time I'd slipped and fell. I was fifteen and not paying attention. I missed a step completely and the whole world felt foreign as it moved around me. I couldn't grasp my senses; I didn't know what the hell was going on or if it was really happening. I reached out to grab the rail and missed it too. The confusion didn't stop until I hit the floor.

That's what death was. Confusion until you stopped.

At least that's what it'd been for Damon, I knew the look when I saw it. The way his eyes darted around at each of our faces, trying to find something to hold on to. No one did the trick, not Elena, Stefan, or even Alaric. They were the three people who crowded around him in his last moments, those were the people who mourned him as they lost him. His eyes searched their faces and his hands gripped theirs. He made a joke about Stefan having the bigger dick now that he wasn't going to be around anymore. Stefan told him he'd always be the bigger dick. Damon told Elena that even though she didn't love him the way he loved her, it was okay because his return policies only included money and the occasional blow job.

She only cried harder.

Damon begged Alaric to bring him Whiskey. Alaric wouldn't leave his side. How Damon was even alive with that many werewolf bites from Klaus was a mystery to me, but he was holding on. His body was drenched with sweat, his skin had gone sallow.

The Originals had gotten wind of our plan, the entirety of it. Damon had come up with the idea of me using my magic to break the blood bond between the originals and the vampires they'd made. If I broke the bond, the Originals could be taken out and no harm would come to the Salvatores or Caroline. It would be easier to kill them because no one would have to worry about dying. Finally dying for Elena had a little less force behind it. There were no technicalities, no rules.

There was only what needed to be done.

And the plan was flawless. If there was anything I could commit to the memory of Damon Salvatore, it was that the man always had a plan. A plan so good, you were okay with not having thought of it first. I could still remember that day in the Gilbert house, the last time I'd seen him perfect and whole.

"Bonnie's got the juju for this." He said, casually leaning against the fireplace. "It'll work."

"It's crazy and you'll get us killed." Stefan said. "If you think for a second Klaus won't figure out what the hell you're trying to do-"

"There's your problem little brother." Damon replied with ease. "You're thinking too much."

"Somebody has to."

"Not when they're thinking about the wrong things."

"How is staying alive the wrong thing?"Stefan shook his head.

"How have you forgotten you're already dead?" Damon asked coolly.

"You know what I mean." Stefan said through gritted teeth.

"No, I know how you think." Damon responded. "You want to live life, but you don't want to wage a war for it. You know what makes the Originals so powerful? They'll do anything they have to; even fuck each other over to get whatever they want done. They aren't afraid to risk anything or everything. That's why they blindside us when all we do is one up them."

"You're talking about stripping them of something major." Stefan shook his head. "You think they won't feel that? You think they won't know?"

"They'll feel the magic, I don't doubt that, but they won't know what happened to them. If Bennett can work the magic like we need her too, they shouldn't feel much of anything."

"Shouldn't and if? You want us to trust shouldn't and if?" Stefan asked incredulously.

"No." Damon said, somehow making eye contact with everyone in the room. "I want you to trust me."

After that, the meeting had gone pretty much as usual. We'd gone from serious talking into somehow discussing Miss Mystic Falls. Jeremy was texting me plans to sneak into my room later. Normally, I'd have been game, but I had too much on my mind. Damon had given me a task I wasn't sure I could do. More than that, he seemed absolutely positive that I could do it. He and I had never been on good terms exactly. His newfound faith in me made me nervous.

I stood up and put my phone in my back pocket. "I'm gonna step outside for a sec."

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Is this because you don't think you should try for Miss Mystic Falls, again?'

I'd only ever tried out for it one time, and the results had been disastrous. Caroline had spent an hour on my hair, Elena did my makeup, and they both collaborated on my wardrobe. Everything had been going well actually. I filled out all the forms, I smiled my biggest smile, but the applicant interview was where everything went downhill.

"Why do you want to try out for Miss Mystic Falls?" Carol Lockwood asked.

"I think it'll be a positive experience." I said.

"If given the title of Miss Mystic Falls, what will you do for the community?"

"I assume whatever the community needs for me to do." I answered politely.

"You know I've never seen you in anything…"she looked me over. "Well, where did you get that shirt?"

The shirt in question was a yellow peplum top with a conservative neckline.

"It's Caroline's." I said, not bothering with her last name. Mystic Falls was pretty small. Not too many people shared a name here outside of the Mikes. Both of whom were on the football team and best friends.

"See," she continued. "That's what I thought. Miss Mystic Falls is a beacon of hope and a leader for the young girls of our town. She has to not only act the part, but also look it. To be honest, Bonnie Bennett, I've never seen you in anything outside of a cross between the Salvation Army and Bohemian chic."

"And to be fair, Mrs. Lockwood, I haven't seen you be anything outside ofan annoying, busybody, wife to your apathetic husband, a hands off approach to your alcoholic douchebag son, and a town gossip. We all start from somewhere, right?"

Needless to say, it didn't work out.

But Caroline didn't know that. "No. I just need some air."

"Well hurry back." Caroline said. "I need your help with dress colors."

"Take all the time you need, Bon." Elena shook her head. "Caroline's going for pink."

I moved away before they could say anything else.

Outside, the February chill gave me what I needed. It was cool enough to relax me into my thoughts and still enough that I could fade into them easily. I folded my arms and clicked my nails. The last time I'd done a spell remotely as powerful as what Damon's suggesting, I lost my Grams. While I lived with it because there was never any time to slow down around here, I always remembered it vividly. The draining of one's life through magical exertion. The fear of sleeping after I did a spell. Was it exhaustion or was I dying? Would I wake up the next day or would my father have another body to bury?

The only thing that soothed my fears was that I'd been practicing spells by myself without anyone knowing. I'd gotten stronger and I could feel it. Using magic didn't hurt anymore, my telekinesis had improved wonderfully. I could lift all of the objects in my room, including myself, simultaneously and not feel anything other than a rush of power. My fire spells had gotten more precise. My Latin was improving. I now knew the purpose for the elements and how to use them effectively. I bonded more with earth and fire. Water and air had too much change for me. I liked my magic solid and concrete, serving a basic purpose through various mediums.

I held out my hand and looked at my finger tips, pushing a little power into them. Magic crackled like electricity along the tips of my nails and danced along the sides of my hand. As a reflex I expected pain, but there was only power, ebbing and flowing with my breathing and concentration. There was nothing but me and my magic out here in the night. The sounds of nature were the score to my thoughts.

"Power at your fingertips," a voice said from behind me. "I always hated that phrase."

I let the magic fade and sighed. "Being a witch, it's all I hear."

Damon stepped up beside me, face tilted upwards towards the sky. His hair was shorter, he'd cut it, but his bangs were still heavy in his eyes. He wore a deep blue v neck that looked black in the night and clung to his body. His skin was the palest I'd seen, possibly in contrast to the black of his hair, but it all worked for him in ways it wouldn't on anyone else. The only time I'd ever seen the hair and eyes combination had been on bronze skinned celebrities in magazines.

"I can see the stars from here." He said.

"I'm not surprised. You're a vampire."

He smirked. "When I was human, you could see them whenever the sun went down. Now you have to get past the car lights, street lights, all that bullshit."

Were we really discussing stargazing? "I never pictured you as a stargazer."

He shrugged. "Not something I do often."

I didn't know what to say. A silence settled between us.

Damon broke it. "How do you feel about what I said in there?"

Nervous. Annoyed. Pressured. "It's a lot."

"Nothing you can't handle." Damon said.

"I could barely keep a tomb open." I said.

"You didn't know what you were doing."

"My Grams did, look where she is." I said in a distant voice.

"You didn't, look where you are."

I didn't like what he was implying. "Grams was a powerful witch."

Damon faced me and raised an eyebrow. "I know that better than you do."

"Then you should know better than to say shit like that." I said. "She died because she took on all the magic. It's overexertion."

"You can believe that if you want, but don't ask me to entertain it." He said. "I've done my reading. I know exactly what that spell was. There is no taking on all of the magic in a two witch spell. The magic is divided equally because that's balance. You witches are all about balance. It's why you're so judgmental."

Asshole.

"Your Grams couldn't handle the magic. It's nothing against her, she just couldn't do it. You could and you did. It's why you're still here."

He was implying something I couldn't accept. "You're saying I'm powerful than she was."

"I'm saying there's a reason she was teaching you what you needed to know instead of how much you should."

Directly after her death, if he'd said these same words to me, I'd have killed him. If I hadn't been practicing my magic on my own and reading over grimoires from the Bennett women, I'd have killed him. The fact that I'd wondered the same thing once or twice was the only thing stopping me from exploding now.

"I know you've been practicing." He continued. "I bet your magic feels different doesn't it? It feels different whenever you walk into a room. Most witches are undetectable, even by supernatural standards. All of us know when you're coming. We all know it's something big."

"And you think because of that I can do the spell you want?"

"I think you can do the spell because you want the originals dead just as much as the rest of us. I know you can do it because you're powerful."

I shook my head. "I'm not sure Damon."

He sighed. "I'm going to be honest with you. We don't like each other, but I'm sure even you can respect what I'm going to say enough to never repeat it."

I stared at him. Damon's face lost its usual hardness and his eyes showed signs of weariness. The wall he kept up was taken down. It was like seeing him for the first time. I couldn't look away.

"I'm sick of the bullshit." He said. "I'm tired of looking over my shoulder, making deals with undead bastards with power fetishes. I'm sick of it. When this is done, and it will be done, I'm taking a long vacation from everyone here. But it needs to be done."

I knew how he felt. Surprisingly, I understood.

"You," he pointed at me. "Are powerful enough to end this. It's not something I've witnessed, it's not something you want to believe, but it's the truth. I'd bet everything I have or will ever have on the amount of power you're capable of. I don't have faith in too many people or their abilities, but I have it in you. You can do this. You _will _do this. You're that powerful. We both know it."

It turns out, I was.

In order for the spell to work, it needed the blood of Klaus's bloodline. Stefan, Damon, and Caroline all cut their hands and bled into the wooden bowl I'd spelled. The incantation was lengthy, but I got through it fairly easy. I threw in the sage, holy water, and ground white oak. I pushed my magic deep into the spell, putting power behind my words and beseeching my will to be done.

The three of them glowed for about for about four seconds, and then it was over.

"Do you feel anything?" I asked, breathlessly. The rush of power flowing through me had been amazing.

"No." Caroline said. "But I think that's because it worked."

"I'm right next to you." Stefan said in a shocked voice. "I don't feel anything."

I looked at Damon.

"When vampires come from a specific bloodline, we can feel it." He said. "It's like wearing a sign; we all know each other when we're close."

"Like Lucy knew we were cousins." I said.

"Exactly." He nodded.

And he'd been right.

So right that when Klaus found out, he was furious. He didn't know what exactly I'd done, only that he felt off. For some reason or another, he knew Damon had orchestrated the entire thing and that I'd been the one to cast the spell. I'm not sure how he put it together, but he had. What happened after had been horrible.

It all happened in flashes.

Damon, Stefan, Elena, and I had been on our way to the boarding house in Damon's car. The guys were in the front speaking in hushed tones. I was in the back next to Elena. She was talking to me about what to get Jeremy for his birthday. I was telling her about going on eBay and finding limited edition comics.

"He's still into those?" she asked.

"It's what he wants to do when he gets to college." I replied. "He's great at it."

"I mean I knew he was into art, but I thought it was more of a hobby." She said.

"More like a passion." I mused, thinking about it.

"And you would know about his passions right?" Elena teased.

"Don't be that girl." I said.

"You know, if you really wanted to get him something, you could try tickets to Dragon Con in Atlanta." Stefan suggested.

"I want to get him something he can keep." I said. "I hate temporary gifts. And I want it to be personal."

"Memories aren't temporary." Elena said. "And they're really personal."

"They fade. Besides you never remember everything."

"Sketchbook." Damon said from the driver's seat.

I rolled my eyes. "Like he doesn't have a million of those."

"I wasn't finished." Damon said. "Give him a sketchbook, but put a spell on it. Something you know he'll like. Maybe the pages don't tear or they're infinite. His pictures come to life or shit like that."

The idea actually had a lot of merit. I could get something ordinary and make it extraordinary, and Jeremy would love it. He'd be so psyched that his pictures moved and he didn't have to spend any more money on sketchbooks, more of that money might go somewhere else. Like a car fund. Driving everywhere got boring sometimes.

"And if that doesn't work," Damon smirked in the rearview mirror. "Nothing says happy birthday head."

"Seriously, Damon?" Elena shook her head.

Something hit us hard from the right.

All I could hear was twisting metal and shattering glass. The world was spinning, Elena's hair was flying. We flipped three times before the car stopped on its roof and we were all upside down. I coughed and tried to undo the seatbelt strangling me. Stefan ripped his seatbelt off and climbed towards me and Elena, who was regaining consciousness.

Damon wasn't in the car.

Stefan untangled Elena first and then me immediately after. He kicked the door off the car and pulled the both of us out. Elena and I were both coughing and rubbing our throats. She had a small cut on her forehead; I could feel a welt on my neck from the seatbelt. Other than that, it was fine. I ached in places, I'd be bruised, but I was fine. It wasn't the worst thing I'd been in by far.

Until I started paying attention.

Kol, Klaus, and Rebekah were beating Damon so savagely I almost couldn't comprehend what was going on. There was nothing but speed, arms rearing back, feet kicking, crunching sounds. Kol grabbed Damon's head and snatched it back, Klaus punched his face one way, Rebekah punched it the other. It started out slow at first, but then the speed came. Damon's head was moving so fast, I thought his neck would snap.

"Keep her safe." Was all Stefan said before he took off running. He didn't get far.

Klaus lifted Damon by the neck and held him. "Do you really think you can win?"

Stefan stopped, stumbling a little.

Damon had so many gashes on his face, he looked like he'd gotten into it with a knife instead of a fist. I could see the skin slowly starting to heal itself already, but that didn't stop Damon from spitting out copious amounts of blood. Elena clung harder to me. I couldn't say I blamed her.

"Now I'm not exactly sure what your little witch did to me, but I'm not a particular fan of spells." He said. "I don't really like plots against me either."

"Let him go." Stefan said, an anxious tone in his voice.

"I'll make it easy for you," Klaus said playfully. "You can have your pathetic brother back in exchange for Elena Gilbert. Fair trade wouldn't you say?"

"Don't fucking do it!" Damon shouted. "Don't you even think-"

Klaus sank his teeth into Damon's shoulder.

Elena screamed. I started to chant.

"Cast that spell and he loses an arm." Klaus winked at me with yellow eyes. "Someone should've told you about vampire biology, witch. We heal, but nothing grows back."

"Bonnie stop!" Stefan held up a hand.

"Yes, Bonnie, stop." Klaus smiled.

Rebekah and Kol came to stand by Klaus on either side, her expression bored, his gleeful. It was like watching pieces of a deranged puzzle come together. The picture was horrifying, one that had way too many possibilities. I knew we weren't giving up Elena and I'm pretty sure Klaus knew that too. We were going to die out here. I could feel it.

Klaus bit Damon again.

Damon yelped so loud the sound deafened me. My eyes darted around for something, anything, but nothing came. It was like a deer being caught in headlights. Nowhere to go, nowhere to run, nowhere to anything.

"Let this be a lesson to you Stefan." Klaus said. "If I wanted Elena right now there isn't a goddamn thing you can do about it."

He squeezed Damon's neck tighter.

"I'll let the three of you go, but only because I like the chase. Damon, on the other hand? His attempts to kill me have gotten rather annoying."

Klaus bit him one last time and tossed him to the ground.

But not before his final words to me. "For your sake, I hope whatever you did never becomes apparent."

And here we were.

It had been two minutes since Damon died and an extra five when his skin went blue. No one could move him, not that it was even a thought, but it seemed like everyone but me was so strung out on grief. Caroline was holding a sobbing Elena, Stefan's face had gone eerily blank. Alaric's face was grim, and the silence that settled into the living room of the boarding house was so stifling, I could barely breathe.

For the first time in a long time, I felt completely…down. I'd tried to distance myself from the situation entirely and even tried to blame my feelings on everyone else's sadness, but I knew how I felt. I just couldn't explain it. While Damon and I had gotten over our initial hate for each other longer enough to focus on a greater good, he and I had never been friends. There were a few times we'd chuckled at something the other said, but nothing close to what he and Alaric or anyone else may have had.

Why did I feel so bad?

Because he'd trusted me, something I barely did with myself a lot of the time. Damon had told me, rather unexpectedly, that he believed in me. Looking back on the whole thing it was kind of surreal. That moment of honesty I hadn't expected from him, the first person to actually be confident in the extent of my abilities and not the dire need for it…it was affecting me way more than it should have.

My pulse was beginning to thump in my ears, my eyes were starting to water. Suddenly Damon's body was pulling at emotions I was trying to keep down. I was seeing him in his final moments, and the time before that when we were alone outside. My breathing quickened, time slowed down.

I felt the presence before I heard it.

"_You can bring him back."_ A voice from my right said.

I turned to my right and stiffened, seeing who the voice belonged to. Emily Bennett, my ancestor, was standing beside me, looking at Damon's body with a determined gaze. Her skin was fairer than mine, but I could see the resemblance just a little within us. We both had the Widow's Peak and heart shaped faces, our eyes were slightly slanted. While my mother and grandmother had gotten the skin tones, Emily's features had come to me in other ways.

"What?" I whispered.

She looked me right in the eyes. Her lips didn't move as she spoke. _You can bring him back._

Standing in a room full of my friends, I tried to speak as quietly as I could. "It's not possible."

_Resurrection goes against the rules, but that's only for the evil. Damon Salvatore may have been a product of a life stolen, but he was never of black heart. I promised him years ago that if he protected my lineage, I would repay him when the time came. Now is the time._

I stared at her in shock.

"How?"

_Upstairs, in his room, is a grimoire of mine. You need to get it, read the spell, and put it right back where you found it. This is of grave importance. If anyone other than us knows that grimoire exists, the consequences will be dire._

I opened my mouth to say something, but she silenced me with a sharp jerk of her head.

_Do you want to help him?_

I thought of the way Damon risked his life for us. He may have been an asshole, but that didn't stop him from doing what was necessary, even if it was primarily for Elena. Ifelt the yes before I could verbalize it.

_Do as I say. Follow me. _

I backed slowly out of the room, not that anyone was paying attention to me, and when I got to the edge of it, I sprinted up the stairs as fast as I could. Emily was at the top when I got there, turning on her heel and moving quickly down the hall. As I ran, I had a moment to really examine everything in my head. I was running down the hall after my ancestor. She was leading me to the room of the dead vampire downstairs. The dead vampire I was going to resurrect.

I tried to think if weirder things had happened. Nothing came to mind.

"Hey slow down!" I whispered into the darkening hallway. "Emily, wait!"

She stopped so abruptly I almost fell.

_We don't have the time, Bonnie._

"You said you and Damon had a deal." I said. "What does that mean?"

_I said I made a promise and I did. As the acting leading witch of the Bennett line I made a blood oath to Damon Salvatore that if he protected my family, my family would protect his. Keeping him and his brother alive from the Other Side has been tumultuous at best, but I've done it. Whether it's been steering various influences into his path or guiding him away from something, I've kept my promise until now. Now, it's your turn._

My turn? "My turn for what?"

_You're the acting witch of this line, Bonnie. Protecting the Salvatores falls to you._

Wait, what?

Emily looked towards a door at the end of the hall and it opened slightly. She moved towards it quickly, leaving my unasked questions hanging in the air. Protecting the Salvatores falls to me? What did that even mean?

Inside of Damon's room was dark and warm. The colors were blacks and silvers and wood. His room was neat, bed made perfectly, the closet, from what I could see, was organized. I hadn't spent an excessive amount of time around Damon, but somehow the room fit him. I wasn't surprised by any of the décor, only how much personality it had. There were books and magazines, dvd's, and posters. He had an extensive cologne collection that probably cost more than my life.

_In here._

I moved to where Emily was standing, a small space in the corner of Damon's room. I could feel the magic as I got closer to it, the power traveling along my skin like a current. Emily pointed to a single floorboard and I knew what she wanted me to do. I waved my hand and the floorboard flew away. I got to my knees and reached into the darkness.

_Do not touch the book._

I pulled my hand away.

The book floated out of the floor on its own, landing on the floor with a small thump and opening itself. Emily reached out her hand and the pages flipped quickly until coming to a halt on the last page. Emily knelt down on the floor and nodded to the page. I looked at it, piecing it together with my Latin and blinking my confusion.

"The Immortal Coil?" I asked.

_Everything has a place in nature Bonnie, everything. Vampires don't belong to the mortal coil. Your questions will be answered later. If you're going to do this, it needs to be done now before Damon's soul leaves that coil._

Emily looked at the bedroom door and it closed quietly.

"I don't know if you've noticed lately," I said as I reread the spell. "But I'm not exactly the best with spells like this."

_Which is why I'm here. I will anchor you and your magic to this plane so that you don't overexert yourself._

I looked at her. "Have you done this before?"

_The time for questions is endless. The time for Damon is not. _

I shook my head and tried to calm my nerves. A white crystal appeared on the floor beside my knee.

_Read the spell slowly and silently, channel your magic into the crystal. It is a medium acting as Damon's body. _

I picked up the crystal and examined it as best I could. It was pure white, shining even in the dimness of the room, and if I concentrated hard enough I could feel it calling to my magic. Emily stood behind me and put her hand on my shoulder.

_You will be fine._

I took a deep breath and looked at the spell, tilting my head as I read it. With each syllable that left my lips, the magic inside of me grew deeper, more intense. My voice got breathier, my tone deeper. I could feel Emily's hand on my shoulder, but just barely. A wind began to circulate in the room, rustling random papers and playing with the strands of my hair. My bangs fell into my eyes, magic crept over my skin in a million tiny pricks.

I went backwards onto the floor, my back arching with the magic.

For a second, I was nothing and everything. I was corporeal and spiritual, teetering on that balance between the Other Side and the plane I lived on. Magic rushed over me in waves, crashing against the barrier of my psyche and tapping into the core of my being. Reality flickered like an old television, a million sounds became one noise. My lips were still moving, but I couldn't hear myself. I was still breathing but I couldn't hear my pulse. Emily disappeared and reappeared. The world followed suit.

_Now, Bonnie. The crystal!_

I pulled as much power as I could and shoved it into the essence of the crystal. I pictured Damon's lifeless body being filled with the magic of the spell and making him whole again. I wanted his wounds healed, the werewolf venom purged from his body. I wanted him walking and talking and living and breathing.

The words came from nowhere and danced from my lips. "Return, Damon Salvatore! Return to the Immortal Coil!"

The crystal burned hot inside my palm, then cooled so fast I shivered.

The magic left me so fast, it hurt. It was like ripping away a band aid only this was stripped away from every part of me. I could feel myself trembling as I rolled on my side facing Emily's calm and collected frame. I was so cold, as cold as the crystal I was holding.

"D-did it work?" I managed to stammer.

She nodded. _You did well._

I sat up and tried to get to my feet, and fell right back to the floor. Emily was behind me with her hand on my back, but I couldn't feel it. I shook my head and waved her off, pushing myself shakily to my knees and then to my feet. When the room stopped spinning, I faced my ancestor.

"I have questions." I said.

_I have your answers. _

"Not right now." I didn't think I could take it.

_When you're ready. Go, I will put away the grimoire._

I swayed a little as I walked, but I managed to make it to the door okay. Leaning against it for a few seconds felt wonderful.

There was a loud crash followed by a bang.

_One last thing._ Emily said as I turned the knob. What the hell was going on?

I nodded, keeping my eyes closed and trying will away the magic induced vertigo.

_You need to keep the crystal hidden. It is the very thing tethering Damon to this world. Should anything happen to it, he will die._

I whirled around say something, but she was gone.

And I was paying for that whirl. The room spun so hard I had to press my forehead against the cold wall in order to keep from throwing up. I took a couple of deep breaths and moved as quietly as I could from Damon's room. I stayed against the wall, using it to keep me upright and clinging to the rail for dear life as I braved the stairs. I put the crystal in my bra and shivered again at the coolness of it. In my head, when I got back downstairs, Damon would be awake and fine. He would crack a joke about it not being that easy to kill him. And everything would be normal.

I should've known better.

The scene I walked in on chaotic to say the least. Stefan was flying through the air like a doll and Elena was being guarded by Alaric. Caroline was recovering from whatever happened to her and slowly getting to her feet. Stefan was back up in seconds.

"Damon," he said. "Damon calm down."

"Go to hell, _brother_!" Damon spat. "You did this to me! You've ruined me!"

"What did I do?" Stefan asked. "Calm down and tell me what I did."

"Stop telling me to calm down!" Damon boomed so loud, I felt it in my chest. "Don't play the victim here, Stefan, you've always done it!"

He was about to leap again.

"Damon!" I shouted.

He stopped on a dime and faced me. Everyone did.

I willed myself to walk upright and ignore the exhaustion I was feeling. If I didn't get to a couch or a chair soon, I was going to pass out. I was so nauseas, I felt like I was going to throw up every bit of the last ten years. When I got close enough to look at him, I could see just how well the spell worked.

Every part of Damon was healed. There was no evidence of the massive beating he'd incurred earlier or the car accident we'd been in other than dried blood on his face. I looked at his ripped shirt and saw no werewolf bites. His skin was smooth and pale and taut over his muscles. I looked him over twice, marveling at the spell I'd casted to bring him back.

Until I got to his eyes.

There was something off about the eyes. Physically, they were the same blues they'd always been. Evenly shaped and startlingly clear, like staring into smaller versions of icy blue pools. The closer I stepped to him, the more I was noticing about him. His eyes roamed over me, darting over my body and landing on my own eyes. His gaze softened slightly.

That's when I knew.

"Damon what-" Stefan started, but I held up my hand to stop him.

I asked the first question. "What is your name?"

He stared at me for a second, his heaving chest slowing immediately to a regular breathing rhythm.

"Damon. Damon Salvatore."

He had an accent. A slight one. More like his words had a different cadence.

I asked the second question. "Do you know where you are?"

Damon looked around. Twice. "Boarding house."

It was more an observation than anything.

I paused before I asked the next question, wanting to phrase it correctly. "Damon how old are you?"

"Twenty two."

"What?" Caroline asked from the corner of the room. "No, Damon, how old are you n-"

"Oh my god." Stefan said, face shocked.

Damon's eyes went completely black this time, fangs extended. I thought he might've been coming for me, but instead he had Stefan against the wall in seconds.

"How quickly we forget brother!" He hissed. "You know what you did, own up to your actions for once in your life! Tell them what you did!"

Stefan didn't have to say anything, I already knew. Damon had, if one was paying attention, basically told all of us what Stefan had done. Twenty two, unexplained anger, uncontrolled emotions, and the speech confirmed everything for me. Stefan had killed his brother.

He'd turned Damon into a vampire and, right now, it was all Damon knew.

**A/N: DUN, DUN, DUUUUUUUUN!**

**Actually I'm really sketchy on this ending. Sigh.**

**So I'll let you guys decide whether I should post a second chapter to this or not. Don't worry, I'm still doing Effervescent. The chapter is still being posted on the 12****th**** as promised (See Lapis Love's tumblr. Hey boo!)**

**So I'm saying this here and will probably reiterate it in some form in the next chapter of Effervescent, but I had a lot going on. The main thing is that while I wanted to write Bamon, I couldn't really concentrate solely on effervescent. It's like binge watching a show and needing a break, but not wanting to completely let go of the universe altogether. Maybe no one understands that, but I hope you do. I needed my creative Bamon juices flowing, I needed to get back into the swing of writing my characters, and I just needed to do something with all the ideas I had. **

**I sincerely hope you guys like this, and I'll trust you to let me know if you don't.**

**PM me for questions. Read. Review, Review, Review.**

**AGAIN I AM CURRENTLY WORKING ON EFFERVESCENT AS WELL. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ASK ME WHEN I'M UPDATING. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ASK ME IF I'M UPDATING. YOU DON'T NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THE UPCOMING UPDATE BECAUSE IT IS UPCOMING. **

**RGE**


	2. The Found

**A/N: I'm so excited for this story, you have no idea.**

**Chapter Two: The Found**

To say that I'd never been happier to leave the Salvatore Boarding House was an understatement of immense proportions. Damon had finally calmed down, much with Alaric and my help, but he detested Stefan. He wouldn't go near him, wouldn't speak to him, and we quickly learned that anything Stefan did to change either of those things resulted in a violent outburst.

The situation with Elena, though, was what made me leave.

On some level, rationally, I'd expected Damon to look at Elena and see Katherine which is exactly what happened. He saw her, looked her over, and stared at her for the longest time before he came to the conclusion it'd taken him years to come to prior to his death.

"You lied to me." He said.

Elena took a step closer, side stepping Stefan's guarding arm. "Damon you're not yourself right now."

"I am very much myself, thank you." He said defiantly. "And who I am isn't changing the matter of you not being imprisoned in a tomb."

She exhaled and smiled softly. "I'm not Katherine, Damon."

Damon scoffed. "And I suppose he's not my brother either?"

"I'm a descendant of Katherine." Elena said, coming a little closer. "I found that out not too long ago. The real Katherine is…well, we don't know where she is. My name is Elena Gilbert. We're friends, remember?"

He stared at her long and hard as Alaric and I stood on either side of him. I watched as his eyes roamed over her features, over her body from head to toe. I could see his head tilt as he looked her back up from toe to head and his eyes settled on her again. He shook his head.

"Stay away from me." He said in a low voice.

"Damon," she shook her head. "I swear I'm not Katherine."

"I don't care who you are." He said. "The way my brother is looking at you like you're some kind of prized possession means any contact with you inevitably means contact with him. Stay the fuck away from me."

Elena gasped, taking a step backwards.

My phone rang.

Damon was out of the chair he'd been sitting in and in the corner of the room, eyes darting around frantically. His eyes had gone black, the signature vampire veins rising on his skin, as he looked around, trying to find the location of the noise. I didn't even bother to look at the screen as I pressed the volume button.

"He really doesn't remember us." Elena said quietly. "None of us."

"He barely remembers himself," Caroline said. "I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

"We're ignoring the bigger issue here." Alaric said. "When Damon came in, he had three werewolf bites and enough venom running through him to make five werewolves. He should be dead, well, deader. More dead. Whatever. How is he alive?"

A voice whispered through my mind. _No one can know._

I acted quickly. "Maybe the spell I did to sever the bond on you guys made you immune to Klaus's werewolf bite?"

Stefan nodded. "That has to be it. Does that mean we're all immune to it?"

"I wouldn't press your luck." I warned. "Damon barely beat it and even then he still died. Coming back is a miracle and everything, but the three of you running around with no memory isn't good."

Luckily, everyone agreed.

When I looked back at Elena, I saw her looking at Damon in the corner. When I followed her gaze, I saw that Damon actually looked content in the corner. Sort of. His face was blank, but his eyes were pensive. I was pretty sure as long as he stayed in that corner and no one but Alaric tried to talk to him, he'd be fine.

"Do you think you can look inside his head?" Stefan asked me. "I mean, just to see if he's okay?"

"Tomorrow." I said. "Or maybe the day after that, depending on how I'm feeling."

Stefan nodded. "Let me know."

I took that as my cue to leave. "I'm gonna head out."

Elena hugged me and the both of us winced. "Fucking Originals."

I nodded. "We'll be fine. I'm a witch and I'm pretty confident Stefan's going to give you blood later."

She rolled her eyes. "He's insisting."

Good. "The worst injuries are the ones you can't see."

"You sound like a doctor."

I shrugged and winced again.

And now here I was, naked in my bathroom after having gotten out of the shower and staring at my body in the mirror. After I'd hidden the crystal in a pentagram covered space in the back of my closet, I came home and took a shower. No one could touch or find the crystal but me. Bruises were starting to cover my sides, arms, and chest. The welt from the seatbelt had gotten redder, glaring against the warm caramel of my skin.

I focused intently on my magic.

Using the earth's energy to do magic was a lot different from using the innate magic most witches came with. It was stronger, more direct, less influenced by the emotions that a witch had. Pulling on the power itself was something the witch did, but the magical response came from nature itself. I braced myself against the counter and closed my eyes.

I've heard magic described in different ways, usually by people who didn't know what they were doing, but from what I gathered, it felt different for everyone. When I used magic, it didn't feel like a caress or a wave crashing against my aura. It was a letting go of the senses, bonding with the external forces of the earth and opening my aura to the world around me. I invited only what I needed, healing and health, and let the rest filter through.

Warmth spread through my body, soothing the aches and forming bruises. I could feel it from the top of my scalp to the soles of my feet, pulsing and finding the places that needed healing. My headache disappeared, the pain in my shoulders and back were gone. I could breathe easier again, the pressure in my chest subsided.

When I opened my eyes, they were glowing.

I watched as the marks and scrapes on my skin faded into nothing and the flawlessness I'd had this morning took over. The bruise on my side had faded away, the angry red welt around my neck was gone. The scrape on my face from the glass healed instantly. By the time I wiped the steam off the mirror again, I was completely healed. My eyes went from the glowing green back to their regular olive green.

I felt light as I walked from the bathroom back into my room, sitting on the bed and grabbing my comb. I went through my hair and ends about three times before I summoned my innate magic and closed my eyes again. I shook my head back and forth , channeling the magic through the tendrils of my hair until they felt less wet. I smiled when I ran my fingers through my hair.

Perfectly dry.

"Cool trick."

I grabbed my brush and turned around. "I thought we talked about you coming through the front door."

Jeremy stepped all the way in my window and closed it behind him. Drawing the curtains closed. He walked over and flopped down beside me on the bed, looking me over and playing with the end of the blue towel I was wrapped in.

"I called you twice." He said looking me over. "Are you okay?"

I shrugged. "I've been through worse."

He shook his head. "You were attacked by three homicidal vampires. How does it get worse?"

"You haven't felt the migraines post magic."

His finger trailed along my arm. "Elena told me what happened. Does he really not remember anything?"

I shook my head. "Outside of Stefan turning him into a vampire? Not from what I've seen."

Jeremy looked at me. "Do you know how he came back?"

I gave him my "theory" about the spell.

Jeremy chuckled. "I knew it had to be you."

"It wasn't me." I corrected. "It was a fluke of the spell."

"Yeah, but you cast it."

"Unknowingly." I said.

"Amazingly."

"Barely."

"Powerfully."

We kissed each other softly, him sitting up and coming closer and me leaning more into him. Jeremy and I had a semi complicated relationship that the both of us agreed not to over think. We were friends when we needed to be and everything else when we wanted it. After Vicki, grams, and Anna died, the both of us were left in the crossfire between Elena and the Salvatores. One night I'd found him outside of my window.

Everything else just kind of happened from there.

And while he and I had both agreed to keep the friends with benefits thing strictly that, I could see that he liked me more than he should've. It wasn't anything against him or even the age difference that kept me from reciprocating. Jeremy was mature than most of the guys my age and actually got me, mostly, as a person. The only thing that kept me from going that extra mile with him was the fact that, in addition to him being Elena's brother, younger or otherwise, he had a lot of emotional scars. Vicki he'd sort of gotten past. He told me once that looking back on it, it'd have never worked between them. It was too one sided.

Anna on the other hand, was the one he grappled with the most.

While neither of us would call it his first love, it was deeper as far as the circumstance. She was his real introduction to the world of the supernatural and he was even going to kill himself in order to be with her.

I shouldn't have laughed as hard as I did.

"Hey!" he said, smiling sheepishly. "It's not funny."

"Pills?" I asked through giggles.

"I didn't want to do anything drastic!" he defended himself. "Shooting myself in the head-"

"Would've gotten the job done." I finished for him. "Sleeping pills take way too long. All you did was heal yourself out of an overdose."

"Well I know that _now_." He rolled his eyes.

"Moral of the story, Jer," I said. "Is that if you want to die, you will. Don't play with things like that."

"Yes, mom." He rolled his eyes.

When it was just me and him, like it was now, it was easier for the both of us to forget the bullshit that went on a lot of the time. Even though I took things slower emotionally, I did care for him. Sometimes the secret glances he gave me or the slight brushing of arms he did when we were in front of the others was enough to keep me out of my bad moods. Everyone had their ideas about us, but it was all speculation. No one knew the depth of what we had but us. And Matt.

He sucked on my bottom lip and pulled away. "What do I have to do for you to ditch the towel?"

I looked him over. "Lose the clothes."

Jeremy sat up and took off his jacket, pulling his shirt over his head while I worked on his belt. When he tossed his shirt to the side at the same time I unzipped his jeans, he slid and his boxers off in one fluid motion. He was all lightly tanned skin, hard length, and muscles though I never understood where he got them from. He looked me over, heat in his eyes.

"Your turn."

I smirked and reached down to the small knot of towel above my breasts.

"Bonnie!" my dad called as the front door shut. "You home?"

Jeremy went pale. I rolled my eyes.

I covered his mouth with my hand. "Yeah, dad!"

"Come down for a sec!"

I rolled my eyes again. My father was fulfilling his cock blocking duties.

I tilted my head my door swung shut, locking itself. I took off the towel, much to Jeremy's surprise and climbed on top of him. I kissed him deep, forcing my tongue past his lips and swallowing his moan. His hands trailed down to my hips. I bit lip and pulled back.

"You have to go."

He looked dazed. "I can wait until you're done."

It was one of the few times I saw his age. I laughed. "Jeremy."

"I can be quiet." He nodded. "I swear."

I got off of him and grabbed a pair of panties out of my drawer. He watched me as I slid them on and shook his head as I put on a big t-shirt and sweatpants. By the time he saw me put on the rainbow socks, he'd given up.

"I hate your dad." He said, getting dressed.

"No you don't."

"I hate his timing."

"That's more accurate."

When he was dressed, he grabbed his jacket and pulled me close to him. "Come over later."

I put my hands up his shirt. "I'll think about it."

"Blue isn't my favorite color." He kissed me.

"I'll text you."

"You better."

Jeremy climbed out of my window and I left my room. Downstairs I smelled Chinese and saw my dad going through the mail. When I came into the kitchen, he handed me an envelope. I knew what it was before I touched it, almost opting not to this time.

My dad called it. "She's only reaching out."

I shook my head and took it.

My mother, Abby, had been reaching out to me lately in hopes of repairing our damaged relationship. She didn't call, she didn't own a phone that I knew of, but preferred to write to me from the different places she was visiting. She told me about a coven in New York that took in fallen witches, ones who'd become vampires, and about another coven she was going to visit in Nebraska that boasted a cure for vampire witches.

_I don't believe it,_ she wrote once, _but it's worth finding out._

I responded to her, but where her letters were three to five pages front and back, mine could barely push front and back. She told me how much she loved and missed me, but not even a line down would tell me how she couldn't be with me right now. As if there was a time to re enter your abandoned teenage daughter's life.

I shook my head and willed away the dramatics. Besides, my father was watching me.

"Sesame Chicken?" I asked.

He stared at me. "Aren't you going to open it?"

"Later." I said. "How was your day."

He let it go. "It was fine until the new shipment of vervain came in. I spent most of the day organizing orders from different growers."

My father's job in Mystic Falls, that no one really knew about, was surveying the shipment of vervain and vervain seeds that made it into the town. For the most part, vervain is indigenous to Mystic Falls, but it doesn't grow in abundance like it does in places like Atlanta. Dad is the one who makes sure it gets here.

And in the water supply.

"It sounds like weed if I half listen."

"Full listen." He said. "No drugs."

"I'm sure you smoked in college."

He looked at me. "Once. And anything that can make chips taste that good should stay illegal."

I laughed at him and grabbed a box.

My dad sighed. "Your mother's coming back into town."

I stopped reaching for the chopsticks. "What?"

"In a month or so." He said. "She told me about a week ago."

"And why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm pretty sure it's in that letter."

"That doesn't answer the question."

"She wanted to be the one to tell you, Bonnie." He said. "it's witch business is all she said to me. I can't get involved in that."

I reached for the chopsticks again and they snapped.

"Hey," my dad said. "Calm down."

I shook my head. "She's not a witch anymore dad. Why does she need to come into town?"

"You're still her daughter." He offered.

"Nice of her to remember."

"Bonnie." My dad's voice was stern. "I don't blame you for being upset, but there's a level of respect you need to have. From what I know, she didn't leave you because she wanted to."

"And she didn't come back either."

My dad shook his head. "Life gets in the way, baby. Maybe when you're older you'll get it."

He stepped out of the kitchen and went upstairs. I wasn't hungry anymore. I grabbed the letter off the table and went upstairs to my own room, wishing I'd let Jeremy stay. I closed the door and ripped open the letter, skimming through the emotional shit. She was coming in town in two months, right after she came back from California. I ripped up the letter and tossed it on the floor.

I got into bed and turned off my phone. After awhile, the events of the day caught up to me and I crashed.

When I woke up the next morning, I felt…I don't even know how I felt. I waved my hand and the pages of the letter came back together. I put them deep into the back of my drawer like I did all her other letters and got dressed for school. When Grams died, I ditched the crazy floral and patterned tops and got into my own style. The burgundy button down and navy jeans accentuated my curves. I slid my feet into my black boots and slipped on a cardigan.

I left before my father could speak.

And immediately felt bad for it. There was nothing he could do about my mother coming back into town, especially with her wanting to see me, and I needed to apologize. I was just so tired of my mother being a shadow parent. I shouldn't have had to track her down and I damn sure shouldn't be pen pals with her. Grams died and she didn't even come to the funeral. My seventeenth birthday passed and I didn't even get so much as a call.

Letters meant nothing to me.

And even though I could see where my father was coming from, even though he thought I couldn't, it still didn't change anything for me. Leaving because you wanted to drive away a bloodthirsty Original vampire is fine, but what happens when you've driven him away? My father could chalk it up to life getting in the way, but no one could answer that question. My mother left for noble reasons and stayed away for her own.

Another husband and his son proved that.

What I couldn't understand was why everyone felt the need to make it about a mother and daughter reunion when there had never been a mother daughter bond. It wasn't like she had to be away as long as she had to be. There were times when she could've come home. Hell maybe if she'd been home, things would've been different. I'd have had an earlier start on my magic. The Salvatores could've been driven away.

Grams could possibly still be here.

I pushed it all to the back of my mind and tried to focus on other things. The situation with Damon was the place my mind went to, but I didn't want to think about that either until I could officially sit down and talk to Emily again. I needed some clarity on the Salvatores being my responsibility and the spell she'd had me cast. Where the hell had she even gotten something like that in the first place?

The drive to school was filled with pop songs I didn't listen to and speeding. When I parked in the student parking lot, I got out of the car and found Matt and Tyler walking together. Me and Matt smiled at each other. Me and Tyler nodded and he left. I didn't have anything against him, not really, he was just a hybrid. Anything I say can and will be used against me if it gets to Klaus.

"You're cold blooded, Bonnie Bennett." Matt said. "Leaving Jeremy hanging like that."

I rolled my eyes. Matt was the only other person to know about us. "I wasn't going to him dressed in my mommy issues. It doesn't make for effective sex."

Matt straightened. "Another letter?"

"And an impending visit." I sat down beside him.

He whistled. "You're not taking it well."

"I'm not taking it at all if I can help it. Maybe I can write and tell her to just call."

"Won't work." Matt said. "If there's anything about flighty moms, it's that when they want to see you, they want to actually look at you. Skype doesn't work either. I tried."

Shit. "That was my next option."

He shrugged. "Kill it."

I sighed. "She says it's witch business."

"Isn't she a vampire?" he asked. "Can they be both?"

"Nope." I said. "Once you die, you're cut off from nature unless you're a spirit."

"Ah." He said. "Even trade off, I guess."

I changed the subject. "Jeremy was mad?"

"Nah, just horny. Said something about blue not being his favorite color. Whatever that means."

I told him.

"You know I could've gone the rest of my life not knowing about Jeremy's balls."

"You guys are best friends." I said innocently.

"So are we and I'm not thinking about your-"

"Bonnie?" Stefan approached us.

He and Matt nodded to each other, more out of principle than anything. Matt was a nice guy and Stefan still felt kind of bad for stealing his ex girlfriend.

I had a feeling where this was going. "I'll be right back, Matt."

Matt got his bag and waved me off. "Just meet me at lunch. I've gotta go talk to coach anyway."

"Okay." We hugged each other and he walked the opposite direction.

Before I can say anything, Stefan beat me to it. "Damon's missing."

My eyes narrowed. "What do you mean missing?"

"As in he snapped my neck and knocked Alaric unconscious. We don't know where he is or where he might've gone."

I was having one of those moments where I was piecing together bits of information Stefan was probably leaving out. I found it easier, and more effective, when I did that. What Stefan wasn't telling me was that at some point, even though Alaric and I had strongly advised against him trying anything with his brother, he had. When Damon saw the opportunity, he got the drop on Stefan and mercifully had enough self control not to kill Alaric in the process.

I sighed.

I looked around us twice to see if anyone was watching us. No one was. "Prick your finger."

"What?" Stefan asked.

"Prick your finger."

Stefan looked at me and then slowly pressed his finger into an extended fang. When he put his finger back out, I focused on the drop of blood welling at the tip. I concentrated my magic into a locator spell, using Stefan's blood as a gateway into Damon's. If it went right, Damon's location would pop up in Stefan's mind. I explained this to him.

"I see trees." Stefan said. "Everything's moving fast."

"Focus on what's in front of him." I said. "Most of the woods here have some kind of landmark in them. Mystic Falls put them there for the scavenger hunt the kids do twice a year. Do you see anything?"

Stefan was quiet for two minutes before "A statue of a bird."

I knew where it was. "He's north. Almost to the edge of the woods."

He blinked his way out of the spell. "Thank you."

"No problem." I said pulling my magic back into myself.

"Bonnie," Stefan stopped me.

"Yeah?"

"Don't tell Elena." Stefan said. "She's already pretty worried about him not remembering anyone, she doesn't need to know he's gone."

"At least not until she comes over later to see him and finds out herself."

"I'm hoping I find him before then. Can you keep her busy after school?"

Finding Damon was one thing, lying to Elena was another. "You know how persistent she is."

"And I know she'll listen to you if you're convincing." Stefan pleaded. "I just need to be able to find him before he hurts or kills anyone."

I nodded. "I'll do what I can."

Stefan nodded at me and turned back towards the student parking lot. I headed into school and counted off the many ways I was done with today already. My mother was coming back into town. I was a bitch to my father. I had to try and convince Elena that she wasn't needed.

That alone was going to be the most annoying thing.

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't know how to do it without rousing any kind of suspicion. As I went to my locker and got out my books, the game plan in my head had already mapped itself out. I would even get Caroline on board as an added bonus. Everything would run smoothly, Stefan could find Damon, and I would be ready to kill myself by the time it was over.

I walked into class and sat in the middle with Elena and Caroline. "Let's go look at dresses."

The both looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You hate Miss Mystic Falls." Elena said.

"I'm trying something new."

"You told us you'd rather scalp yourself." Caroline said.

"My hair and I have been getting along lately."

"You hate gowns." They both said.

I was a mini skirt girl, tried and true. Being five foot two, they made my legs look longer. Gowns swallowed me whole, I always tripped over them, and there was this one time at my cousin's wedding someone actually stepped on the back of mine and completely ripped the back.

"Okay well just because I'm not doing it doesn't mean I can't be supportive." I said. "You guys are into it and you're my best friends."

Elena didn't look convinced. "I don't know. I was going to go check on Damon after school."

"He doesn't want to see you, remember?" I said.

"Well yeah, but that's only because he thinks Stefan is going to be there." Elena shrugged. "I have a key to the house, I could just-"

"Go and get yourself killed." Caroline rolled her eyes. "Give the compassion shtick a break, Elena, Damon doesn't remember you and the last person he does remember is Katherine. He won't take it too well."

"We can't just sit back and not try anything. He'd try to get my memory back if he could."

"Or try to get you to fall in love with him while you didn't know anything." Caroline raised an eyebrow.

It was scary how much she and I thought alike sometimes.

"So I'm supposed to go dress shopping while Damon doesn't know who he is?"

"He knows who he is," I told her. "He just doesn't know who he's been."

Elena opened her mouth, but Caroline cut her off.

"Look bitch, we finally get Bonnie on board and you're not talking yourself out of this. We're looking at dresses after school or I swear I'm scalping _you_."

Elena sighed. "Fine."

Caroline smiled. "Great. I'm driving."

When school was over and I'd driven my car back to house, I left a note for my dad on the fridge and told him where I'd be and to call me if he needed anything. I also apologized for this morning, but I'd do it again when I got home later.

Dress shopping with Caroline Forbes is an event everyone should experience at least once before they die. It was like watching a bridezilla on her sweet sixteenth getting ready for prom and just really one of those things you couldn't help but laugh at. She tossed the amber and bronze gown to the side and rolled her eyes.

"I look like a fucking desert."

Elena came out in a deep blue, one shoulder, Grecian dress that swayed when she walked. The color did wonders for her skin and hair and added an intensity to her eyes that wasn't there otherwise. She looked less Miss Mystic Falls and more ethereal. I gave her a thumbs up.

"Really?" she asked, turning in the mirror. "It's not too dark?"

"Screw you, Elena." Caroline said half jokingly. "You and that Bulgarian tan go with everything."

Elena winked and said something I couldn't understand. It wasn't until I double checked that I realized it was Bulgarian.

"You speak Bulgarian now?" I asked.

She shrugged. "Stefan and Damon thought it would be better if I knew some of it. Just in case I had to be Katherine at some point."

Caroline was pulling the strap of a coral halter dress over her head. "When the hell would Katherine have to speak Bulgarian? She doesn't even acknowledge her past unless it's necessary."

"They said it was just in case."

"Or they have some kind of weird Katherine fetish you're fulfilling." Caroline said as she turned.

"Aww, Caroline." Elena said. "Reef chic this year?"

Caroline paused. "Is that payback for what I just said or do I really look like that?"

Elena and I looked at each other. "Both."

Caroline growled.

Elena looked me over. "And why aren't you trying on anything?"

I looked up from my phone. "I'm moral support."

"Moral support your ass in a dress." She shot back. "You said 'let's' as in you included. Try something on."

I shook my head. "I'm not doing the pageant."

"But you are coming to the ball." Caroline said. "It's formal."

"I know it's formal." I said glaring at Caroline as she winked. "I'm just-"

I'd taken my eyes off Elena too long. She had a dress in her hand already. "Here you go."

It was plum colored which was a plus, but long which was a minus. I took it from her. "One dress."

"Three." Elena said.

"Five." Caroline chimed in.

"One." I hissed at the both of them.

I walked into the dressing room and stripped out of my clothes. I looked at the dress as it mocked me from the hanger, the Queen Anne neckline looking way too intimidating for my liking. I rolled my eyes and grabbed the dress, taking it from the hanger and unzipping, gritting my teeth when the zipper caught.

"Stupid fucking dress." I seethed.

"Hurting the dress's feelings won't help you feel better." Caroline sang.

"Hurting you might!" I sang back.

I managed to get into the dress and flip my hair out of the back. When I stepped out of the dressing room, Caroline and Elena stopped what they were doing.

The dress was one of those numbers that looked so good my father would shoot himself if he saw me in it. It gripped my body in all of the right places and showed the definition of my hips and the small of my waistline. My breasts peaked out of the top of the neckline and the color did wonders for my skin tone. The best part was that there was no obnoxious train and it swished around my ankles giving me room to walk.

For a second, just a tiny one, I felt like I had a chance at Miss Mystic Falls.

It was confirmed by Caroline. "Bonnie I don't care if you wear it around the house. Get the goddamn dress."

"Agreed." Elena smiled.

I didn't remember buying it. Just leaving the store with it.

Of course buying it sent Caroline, who'd chosen a pale gold goddess dress, up the wall as far as shoes were concerned. The ball was a month and a half away and yet she was already on her phone ordering shoes online. Elena considered the blue dress for awhile until she found a magenta floor length with a sweetheart neckline. She smiled at me from the passenger seat.

"You own a gown." She said.

"The both of you did this to me." I shook my head. "Peer pressure at its finest."

"You know some people peer pressure their friends into meth or something. We got you a dress we'll hate you for once you do your hair and makeup. Be thankful."

Elena and Caroline wanted to go to the Grill, which was fine because I was starving anyway. Having skipped dinner last night, chicken fingers and fries were calling my name. Caroline smiled at our waiter, a cute sophomore who was a year younger than us and had a crush on her. Almost everyone did.

Matt shook his head. "He's new, Care, chill."

She blinked. "I didn't do anything."

"You're going to make him a man servant." Matt replied.

"Nothing he doesn't already want to be." She smiled.

"Tyler would kill him."

"Oh please." Caroline waved it off. "He has groupies throwing rose pedals and Hanes panties on the ground when he walks. He'll be fine."

Matt shook his head and looked at Elena. "Wow Elena, quietest I've ever seen you."

She looked up and pushed her hair behind her ear. "Sorry. Stefan's being evasive."

"His brother has amnesia, sweetie, he gets to not answer the phone today." Caroline said.

"Damon has amnesia?" Matt said. "The hell do you people do when I'm not around?"

"Wild sex parties and alcohol induced raves." Caroline replied.

Matt looked at me.

I shrugged. "I'm usually holding the camera."

"So Chicken fingers and a basket of fries, a Grill Burger, and a Salad." Matt said.

The three of us agreed.

Matt threw a straw at Elena's head. "Calm down, everything's fine."

She nodded and kept texting.

I got a text message, it was from Stefan. From what he was saying, he'd gone to the north of the woods and got Damon's scent, then tracked it towards one of the cities outside of Mystic Falls. He'd gone from roof top to roof top before finally losing Damon in a mall. He didn't have any idea where he was and was on his way back to Mystic Falls now. I looked out of the window and noticed the sun had gone down. Things were only going to get worse from here.

"He's lying to me." Elena said. "I hate when he does that."

"You make it easy sweetie." Caroline said. "Let me ask you something. In the event that something is wrong, what can you do?"

"Damon's probably still freaking out." Elena replied. "It's not like this has ever happened to him. He doesn't have his control, he doesn't know anything outside of instinct. He could hurt someone if he got out or Stefan and Alaric couldn't control him."

Too late.

"Again," Caroline asked. "What can you do?"

"You don't have to remind me of how useless I am." Elena said acidly.

"She's not," I jumped in. "But you need to realize that Stefan's main priority is you. If something does happen and you get in the way, he's going to have to make a choice. I don't think you want to be the reason he makes that decision more than you want to help."

Elena bit her lip and folded her arms. "Fine. You're right."

"Thank you." Caroline exhaled. "Now stop be annoying. You'll see them both later."

When we left the Grill and Caroline dropped me off at home, she rolled down the window. "Do _not _ just throw that gown anywhere. Keep it somewhere safe and away from your closet."

"What's wrong with my closet?" I asked.

"Do you still have those flared hippie jeans and peasant tops?"

I didn't wear them anymore but they were still in my closet. "Yes."

"Keep the dress far away from those."

I gave her the finger and went in the house.

When my dad saw the dress he balked. "it's not Prom yet."

"Miss Mystic Falls." I said.

"You hate Miss Mystic Falls." He said.

"Yeah, I know."

"You told me you'd rather pee acid."

"I remember."

"So you're going to the ball."

"You know me so well."

"Right." He nodded.

"Look, daddy, about the whole thing with mom."

He waved it off. "I get it. She left me too, remember."

I nodded. "I'll handle it better."

"It's not something you have to handle." He said. "Just take it a day at a time. Being all upset isn't going to stop her from coming back but it opens you up to more bullshit and emotions you don't want. Expect little and keep an open mind."

I walked up to him and hugged him. "Most girls get grumpy old men for dads."

"You lucked out." He hugged me back.

As I walked up the stairs, my phone rang. It was Stefan again.

"Bonnie," his voice was frantic. "He's back in Mystic Falls."

I hurried up the stairs and made sure I was out of earshot. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"The three people he killed would agree."

Shit.

"What do you need me to do?" I asked opening my door to the darkness of my room and closing it quickly. I sat the dress down as best I could, heading Caroline's warning.

That's when I heard it. The slightest shift in the wind.

I turned around quickly.

Damon was standing in the corner of my room like a statue unmoving, not even breathing. He was dressed in all black, to match his eyes and the veins surrounding them, and his feet were bare and dirty. He was just standing there, staring directly into nothing, not making a sound.

His mouth and hands were completely covered in blood.

Stefan was saying something, but I couldn't hear him anymore. Damon looked so crazy right now, I didn't want to say anything and risk setting him off. My first feeling was relief that my father was fine and would remain so as long as I kept the situation in my room. My second thought was why the hell did I have to be on the phone with one person Damon couldn't stand.

I opened my mouth to speak. Damon's eyes were on mine.

He was in front of me in the blink of an eye, talking the phone away from me and crushing it in his hand. I called on my magic as quickly and effectively as I could.

When he spoke, his voice was low and deep. "Bonnie, right?"

I nodded slowly. "Yes."

He nodded just as slow. "Good."

Damon grabbed my hair and jerked my head to the side, striking towards my neck like a cobra.

**A/N: What's going on, you guys? How are you? **

**So a couple of things I wanted to address that I didn't in the last author's note. The first is that this is a Damon/Bonnie fanfiction. Despite what you read and what may happen, please remember that first and foremost. I don't even want to say bamon, because I don't want someone to somehow get Beremy out of that. Bonnie and Damon. Damon and Bonnie. Witch and Vampire. You see where I'm going with this. **

**The second is that I wanted to take this story in a completely different direction than I'm going with Effervescent. Bonnie in Effervescent is a lot more innocent, still finding her way, and things of that nature. Bonnie in this story is darker in a since, has a better grip on her magic, and has more of a grasp of who she is as a person. She'll be a lot more vocal about the things that she's saying and…well you get where I'm going with that too. This chapter, I feel, really put you into the feel of the story and gave you who Bonnie is. Hopefully you love her as much as I do. I gave her a universal sense of innocence with my other story, and I want to see how you guys like her with her own specific personality.**

**I took a lot of Damon's past away from him because if it's one thing the Vampire Diaries and whoever the fuck writes it does is center Damon in a lot of his past. It's like Damon will kill and be fine with it but once he remembers certain things about himself he gets all emotional and I just can't get down with that. You'll see a darker Damon here too. For me he isn't dark on the show, he's a vampire. They kill and they don't care. Everyone else seems to want them to feel bad about it.**

**The last thing I wanted to address was a very great review comparing this story to that of Adverse Effects. To be honest, I haven't read the story, but I've heard about it and everyone seems to love it and if it's doing justice to the characters than I love it as well. However, that's not what I'm trying to do here. There is no time travel, other than future flashbacks, and while Emily will play a big part of this story, she's merely a guide for Bonnie. For now. **

**I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, there's definitely more coming soon. Effervescent will be updated as well, probably within the next two weeks or so. Tomorrow is my birthday you guys! Thanks for rocking with me.**

**Read, Review, Review, Review. **

**RGE**


	3. The Living

**A/N: Did I mention I don't own any of the characters here or in Effervescent? I wish I did though.**

Chapter Three: The Living

I reached up quickly and grabbed Damon's throat, pushing magic into his head just as his fang grazed my neck. I hadn't had to inflict pain on Damon in a long time, but it was just like riding a bike. There was a slight ringing in the air, the same one going through his head, and he fell to his knees with a soundless scream. I kept my hand on his throat and spoke in a low voice.

"Retract the fangs." I said. "Now."

He looked up at me and bared them even more.

Damon grabbed my wrist and twisted, wrenching my fingers from his throat and slamming me into the wall. I mumbled a silencing spell keeping my dad from hearing any of this and shoved Damon backwards with my magic. He fell backwards on my bed and used the momentum to spring back, heading towards me again.

I swung my arm in a wide arc and he twisted through the air and right into the wall across from me. He ripped a picture off my wall and threw it at my head and I ducked it, sending more magic at him. I tried sending more pain at him but he shook it off and kept coming. This was going to end one of two ways. Damon unconscious or Damon dead.

"I heard Stefan say you were powerful," he said. "Although honestly I'm not seeing it."

"Give me time." I replied, using the wall behind me to stand. "I'm just getting started."

"Time?" His smirk broadened to a smile, the blood gleamed on his lips. "The concept of time is pointless in my existence, wouldn't you say?"

"Not really." I said, calling my power. "It's always a factor."

He raised an eyebrow. "Well, let's see how much time you have before I kill someone else."

Damon was out of my window in a second.

I rushed over and saw him in my front yard. He made like he was going to my front door, stopped, and then shook his head playfully. I went through my list of spells in my head that would make him fall dead in the grass if he tried to go to my father. Instead, he looked at me and winked.

Then he sped off.

_Find him._ Emily was standing beside me suddenly. _Now_.

I glared at her. "We are having a serious talk when I get back."

_Go._

I ran downstairs and out of the door as fast as I could, shouting something about helping Elena to my dad. In my car, I backed out smoothly and waited until I got to the edge of the neighborhood before I started speeding. I'd sent out my magic as soon as I left the house. He wasn't anywhere in my neighborhood, which was a good thing.

He wasn't anywhere surrounding it either, which wasn't.

I reached for my phone and remembered what happened to it. Stefan was paying me back, I didn't care. Somehow I knew this was his fault. I'd confirm it later after I found Damon and managed to get him back to the boarding house. How I was going to do that was a mystery to me, but I was hoping a plan would come to mind before it was too late.

I needed to go south.

Everything south of Mystic Falls is woods and open road. Once the city faded away there was nothing until you hit the highway. The fact that Damon was heading there was sending of warning bells in my head. I was being led away from town, and the only people who could help me, into a place of practically isolation. This wasn't going to be good by any means.

By the time Damon stopped moving, there was nothing but darkness. I parked on the side of the road and got out of my car, closing my eyes when the door shut. I channeled my magic into my eyes, seeking vision in the dark, and when I opened them and blinked a few times, I could see clearly. I readied my magic at my fingertips, taking a deep breath. I had to go into these woods and find Damon.

I really didn't want to.

But if I didn't, Damon would kill more people. I couldn't take that chance. While I'd been thinking about it over and over again since it'd happened, I was starting to really consider that bringing Damon back from the dead was probably something I didn't need to do. Emily be damned. If they had some sort of agreement, the shit was null and void when he died. That's what death was, a nullification of life. The fact that it was now my responsibility to keep track of him was finding new and varied ways to piss me off.

As I walked I thought back to Emily and her latest reappearance into my life. I'd gone from barely hearing her name to seeing her twice in two days. What was it about Damon that made her come back and, more importantly, why was it so important that he be brought back? I understood the concept of a promise, and I even knew the depth of an oath, but what I couldn't understand was why it was so necessary. If the same thing had happened to Stefan, would she have been so quick to make me bring him back?

Was Stefan my responsibility too? I didn't think I could take that.

The trees swayed out of my way as I walked. I could feel Damon's presence here, but it was subtle. It was like knowing your keys were in your purse, but not finding them immediately. I looked around me as best I could, without making too much noise. Even though I could see, he still had the advantage here. Damon was a vampire, a predator. All of his senses were heightened. I could step on a twig and he'd know where I was. I could exhale and he'd be in front of me. I tried not to think of the worst case scenarios. You know; the ones where he kills me.

The leaves rustled and I jumped.

A branch snapped and was falling towards my head.

I ran out of the way just in time and cringed when I heard the heavy thump of the branch hitting the ground. It was the big kind that'd have knocked me out or killed me if it hit me right. I shook my head and clenched my fists. I'd had enough.

"Get the hell out here, Damon!" I shouted into the woods. "I don't have time for this!"

"There is that word again!" he shouted back. "Time! What does time mean to a vampire?"

I spun around, trying to figure out where he was. His voice was coming from everywhere, bouncing off the trees and echoing in the darkness. All I could see were the trees and the leaves, how the reached towards the sky and made me feel even smaller. There was a rogue, amnesiac, vampire semi stalking me in the woods. What the hell had my life turned into?

"Did you know my father hated vampires?" Damon asked from somewhere in the woods. "Hated them so much, he killed his own sons for loving one."

My eyes darted around.

"Abominations is what he called them. The devil himself taking form of the ones closest to you. I wonder how he felt when it was Stefan who killed him."

Everything went still and I couldn't hear anything. The night had gone silent around me, not even so much as a cricket chirped. I was straining to hear something, anything, that would let me know where he was. I didn't hear anything. All I could see were the trees.

"Do you think I'm the devil, Bonnie?" He asked from behind me.

I turned and he was there, eyes blacker than ever.

His hand shot out and suddenly I was flying backwards. I hit the ground hard and rolled on my side, trying to catch my breath. I saw him walking towards me and I sat up quick, focusing my magic. If Damon wanted a fight, I'd give him one. Out here I didn't have to worry about my father. Out here I could raise as much hell as I wanted.

I flung out my hand, Damon went flying.

When I got to my feet, I rushed towards him. He had landed hard on the ground himself, but recovered quickly and was crouched on the ground. He lunged at me again and I upward swiping motion, causing him to bump into a wall before I brought my hand back down and sent him to the ground. Damon's leg kicked out and swept my feet from under me. I found myself amazed. He couldn't remember what he did three days ago, but he could somehow remember how to kick my ass.

Focus, Bonnie.

Damon tried to get on top of me, but I kicked out hard. When my foot caught him in the gut, he hunched over and when I sat up properly, I hurled him backwards with my mind. We both got to our feet slowly, looking each other over and breathing heavily. I was waiting for him to make a move towards me. it was all I needed and it was over. The decision I made was final. I'd brought him back. If I had to, I'd kill him again.

Damon took off running.

He was running at human speed, which meant I could still keep track of him, but his legs were still longer than mine. I screamed after him to stop, but he only ran faster. I pushed my legs harder, using all I'd learned from cheer camp. Wind picked up in my ears and I shouted a spell to slow him down. He tripped, but kept running. This time, he actually did use his vampire speed.

Emily stepped out of the woods as I ran. _You cannot kill him._

I didn't break my stride. "If I have to, I will!"

She appeared, stepping out ahead of me again. _You mustn't. He is not in his right mind_.

I stopped running and stormed up to her. "Any vampire that threatens to kill for no reason is in his right mind. He's not protecting anyone, he isn't helping. He killed three people today and wants to kill more. I'm not letting that ha-"

I was knocked to the ground.

Damon was on top of me, pinning me down. "Who are you talking to?"

My eyes darted over to Emily. She shook her head.

"Get off me!" I hissed through gritted teeth.

"No." he said, cocking his head. "This is what vampires do, right?"

I struggled, but it didn't help.

His fangs lowered as he came towards my neck. "I have had three humans today. I never thought about a witch."

I grabbed fistfuls of dirt in my hands. "_Per ego vos de terra mea. Malum mihi pateretur._"

Damon's hands flew to his head as he screamed in pain. He shoved himself away from me, scooting backwards and trying to put distance between us. The spell flowed smoothly from my lips, my Latin flawless. I sat up and squeezed the dirt in my hands as I got to my feet, walking towards him as he scooted away. The more I chanted, the more intense his pain became. I focused my magic into the dirt, drawing on my earth magic.

A wind picked up as I focused, bonding with the earth around me. spells like this came naturally to me, speaking in one of the oldest of languages and opening my aura to the magic nature held. I beseeched it to do my bidding, to keep the vampire away from me and it responded. Spirit magic had nothing on this. I never needed them again.

One spirit in particular didn't understand that. Emily was screaming at me.

_Do not kill him, Bonnie!_

The request fell on deaf ears. I was tired of playing around. Twice tonight Damon had made attempts on my neck. He'd threatened me and threatened the lives of others. His memory loss was one thing; his endangering my life was something else entirely. If he wanted to be a vampire, I'd treat him like one.

That's when I heard it.

Damon was screaming something. Blood streamed from his nose and ears, and his fangs had retracted. He was rolling around on his back with my spell, ripping and clawing at his head. He kept screaming something I could barely make out, the wind was too loud. When I pulled my magic away from the dirt in my hands and the wind calmed down, I could hear him clearly.

"Kill me!" he screamed.

I stopped chanting. Everything stopped immediately.

Damon rolled over and looked at me. "No! NO! Keep doing it!"

I dropped the dirt in my hands and gasped.

He sped towards me, going to my knees and pressing my hand against his head. "Do it again, Bonnie."

I tried to snatch my hand away, his grip was iron. "Damon let go of me."

"Kill me, Bonnie, please."

It had lost its appeal. "No, Damon let me go!"

"Do it!" he screamed at me. "Do it now!"

"I said no!" I shouted, my magic slipping from my control.

Damon fell away from me and gave me just enough time to back away. Emily backed into the trees and vanished altogether, leaving us alone out here. Damon was rocking back and forth on the ground, his knees drawn up and his hands raking through his hair.

Something clicked.

He'd killed three men today, leading Stefan away from town just enough so that he could double back in time to run back here and get to me. Stefan wasn't going to kill him, no one else would. He'd gotten into my house. He'd threatened me. He'd lured me out here and attacked me. Damon wasn't trying to keep up chaos, that would've been too easy.

Damon wanted to die. He was giving me reasons to kill him.

"Why won't you do it?" he asked me.

I shook my head and took a deep breath, trying to get myself together.

"I did everything." He said. "I killed three people. I made attempts on your life. What did I not do?"

"I'm not killing you." I said, meaning it.

"Why not?!" he screamed at me. "I'm a vampire, I'm evil!"

"Damon, I need to get you home." I said firmly.

He was in front of me, hand around my throat. "I could crush your windpipe."

I shook my head as best I could. "But you won't."

"Is that a wager?" he asked.

"Can't wage what you've already won." I replied. "I'm not killing you. That's the end of it."

Damon studied my face and his eyes hardened as he stepped away from me. "Then you're just as useless as everyone else."

He was gone.

I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding and tucked my hair behind my ears. The magic in my eyes faltered with my emotions and I knew it was time for me to get out of the woods. There was no more locating Damon, not tonight. Right now, I needed to get as far away from him and the situation as possible. Even though I wanted to go home, I knew the boarding house was my best bet. If Damon wanted to die, he'd find a way to. If Stefan didn't want that to happen, he could look for him.

Emily and I were going to have a chat.

The drive to the boarding house took longer than usual, probably because it was the complete opposite of where I'd been. It gave me time to zone out and clean up my appearance before I got in front of my friends. When I pulled into the circular driveway, I saw that Caroline and Elena's cars were already outside. I didn't bother knocking on the door or looking around. Everyone was in the living room where they all were.

They all ran up to me at once.

I held up my hand. "Don't."

"Are you okay?" Elena asked. "Stefan said he was on the phone with you and then it just went dead. I went by your house to-"

"Please tell me you didn't." I cut her off.

She looked at me. "We all tried calling you."

Fuck me running. "I told him I was with you."

Elena looked guilty. "That would explain his face…"

"Was it Damon?" Stefan asked. "Did he-"

"Hey, _Hey_!" Alaric said loudly. "Everyone back where you were. Let her breathe."

They all looked at Alaric, but slowly moved back into the living room. I walked inside and sat down in the closest chair I could get to. I told them all what happened, especially telling Stefan what happened to my phone, and how everything ended. I left out Emily's hand in everything.

I would handle that part myself.

"He asked you to kill him?" Stefan said after a long moment of silence.

"He thinks he's evil." I said. "He doesn't want to live like that."

"If he only knew." Caroline said, rolling her eyes.

Everyone looked at her.

"I don't pretend well, sue me." she said in a deadpan voice.

Stefan looked down. "He never did."

I sighed. "I don't know where he is now and I'm too tired to do anymore spells. I need to get home, my dad is probably worried."

"I'm sorry about that, Bonnie." Elena said. "We just couldn't find you."

I wasn't going to ask her to use common sense. She'd never done it in the past.

"It's fine." I said. "I just need to make sure Damon didn't double back or something.."

Alaric spoke up. "Stefan and I'll find Damon. Go home and get some rest."

I nodded. "Let me know what you find."

When I left, I let my mind wander. I had never seen Damon look like that, ever. He was sad and…and pitiful. What bothered me the most was how I handled the situation. I'd gone through so much to bring him back that to try to kill him seemed…wasteful. I'd completely ignored everything and almost gone in for the kill. Damon wanted me to see him as a vampire, and that's what I saw him as.

So much for objectivity.

My dad opened the door as I walked up the steps. "Alaric Saltzman called. He said you broke your phone helping him move old history textbooks from his classroom."

I didn't miss a beat. "I didn't know Elena would come over. I'm sorry."

He looked at me. "If your teenage daughter's best friend couldn't find her and her history teacher called you with an alibi, would you believe it?"

I raised an eyebrow. "I'd trust my daughter."

"I bet." He said.

Thankfully, he let me go to my room.

When I closed the door, my lamp turned on. Jeremy was on my bed.

I looked around. "You cleaned."

Jeremy raised an eyebrow. "Your room looked like shit."

"Not my fault."

He held his arms out to me, I dived in. "So I heard. Elena ran out of the house when Stefan called her. You wanna tell me what happened?"

"Not really." I said.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?" he asked.

"Eventually."

"Get naked and hold you while you sleep?"

"There's a reason you're my favorite."

And even with Jeremy holding me, and eventually doing other things I needed to put a silencing spell on my room for, I still couldn't stop thinking about Damon. The look in his eyes when he asked me to kill him. The desperation in his voice. He was…it was the most human I'd ever seen him be. It was the most vulnerable I'd ever seen him be.

That alone was enough to freak me out.

The next morning Jeremy was gone, but he'd left me a small piece of paper with a heart and a pentagram on it.

I showered and got dressed for school, opting for my ripped jeans and combat boots, before I remembered something I needed to do. I looked at my alarm clock. I had an hour and a half before school started and I wanted answers. I closed my eyes and pulled at the spirit world.

Emily was standing by my door. _Yes?_

I shook my head. "No one's here, you can talk."

"I believe you are just tired of hearing me inside your mind."

She had a point. "I need answers."

"I promised them to you, did I not?"

"You said you made a promise to Damon, what was that?"

"That so long as he protected my line, I would protect his."

"So you're saying…what? Damon's the reason we're still alive?"

"More or less." She said calmly. "After the death of Giuseppe Salvatore and the chaos that ensued, Damon Salvatore was the one who made sure we got to various parts of the country. He is the reason that your mother and grandmother were able to live the lives they lived."

"He's the reason they're dead, too." I replied.

"I do not need reminding."

"What about Lucy?" I asked. "He didn't even know about her. No one did."

"Shelia knew of the lineage, but burned the pages of the line so that no vampire could find its surviving members. Damon, over time, did the same thing."

I was shocked.

"He has protected the family as best he could, although there have been mishaps. Ones he has paid for dearly."

"He hasn't paid for Grams."

"Hasn't he?" Emily asked. "A state of emotional unrest and a mockery of an existence isn't punishment enough?"

"I've seen moments, but other than that I wouldn't agree."

"Coping is not the same as living." Emily said. "Remember that."

I asked the question I'd been dreading. "I'm responsible for Damon and Stefan?"

"You're responsible for yourself." She said. "Protecting the line, for them, has come to an end. Damon killed their last living relative. There is no more line for you to protect."

"Then what am I doing?"

"The Salvatores are allies." She said. "Regardless of Damon's actions and Stefan's poor choices, a blood oath is a blood oath. My children have lived to see lifetimes and right now, I am looking at Damon's end of the bargain."

I looked away.

"You will help Damon Salvatore in his time of need and you will keep them alive to the best of your ability. That is all any witch can do. That is all I am asking for."

"Have you met them?" I asked her. "That's not an easy task."

"But I know you." She said. "And I know your heart. You can do this, Bonnie. You are powerful."

"Why me?" I asked. "Why not Lucy or my other relatives?"

"You are the last real Bennett most powerful."

"The last one?" I asked. "You just said-"

"Our line is matriarchal." She said. "There will never be a male witch in our line. Lucy's father is of our blood. Lucy's mother is of the craft."

Logical.

"You're the last of us." She said. "And you are quite gifted."

It meant a lot coming from her. My questions dimmed any pride I could have felt, though.

"Damon got into my house." I said. "I never gave him an invitation."

"Bringing an immortal back from the dead has complications." She said. "When a human becomes a vampire, certain things are stripped from its being. Because the dead are not alive, they cannot plant the roots that a home requires. Therefore they cannot enter them."

"Makes sense." I said.

"A vampire that comes back as a vampire is tethered to the magic that brought him back. The crystal is still active with your magic and it is also an earthly bound thing. So long as it remains, Damon is not limited to the rule of invitation. He is of the earth."

"Does that mean sunlight doesn't work either?"

"Sunlight still extinguishes the dark." Emily said. "Damon is a vampire, the sun can kill him."

I nodded. "Do you know where he is?"

Emily looked away. "No, I do not."

"I thought the spirit world could see everything."

"I am…nature is not pleased with what I've had you do."

I stood up. "Are you okay?"

She nodded and smiled. "I am fine. Just do the best you can, we will worry about me another day."

I didn't like the sound of that, but she was gone before I could say anything.

When I got to school, Elena and Caroline were waiting for me. I would never say it to them, but I kind of liked it when it was just me and Matt in the mornings. Elena's like diving head first into vampire drama. Caroline was her own…she was Caroline. Both of them were kind of strong for eight o clock in the morning, but I loved them, so I dealed.

"Any news?" I asked.

"Alaric said they couldn't find any traces of him." Elena said. "It rained a little last night. The scent was gone."

"Luckily for us, the resident sociopath decided to kill a five more people along the state line." Caroline said.

"Do you have to be so insensitive?" Elena asked. "He's not the Damon you're used to."

"He'll always be the Damon I'm used to." Caroline shrugged. "A prolonged memory lapse isn't changing that. He attacked Bonnie and you're looking for sympathy. Maybe you could stand a little more insensitivity."

Elena opened her mouth, I killed the argument.

"Look," I said. "The point is that we don't know where he is. Tell Alaric I'll do a locator spell after school if he wants."

Elena nodded. "Thanks Bonnie, I know Stefan will appreciate that."

"I'm starting to wonder if he's the only one." Caroline said.

Elena glared. "I'm going to class."

When Elena walked off, Caroline rolled her eyes. "She acts like we don't have the same class. I sit right beside her."

I agreed. "Call me crazy, but you don't seem too upset that Damon's out there."

Caroline shook her head. "My boyfriend worships thy enemy, one of my best friends was attacked last night, and Miss Mystic Falls is rapidly approaching. The Damon thing will work itself out, it always does. Besides, what nobody seems to realize is that Damon doesn't know anything. Sooner or later he's bound to come back because Stefan has answers. All the rest of us are doing is looking for a vampire who doesn't want to be found. I can't stop living life because Damon's gone off the deep end."

"I know, right." I said. "Who has forever to kill?"

"Watch it, bitch." We smiled at each other. "I'm just saying, they do this every month. They alternate really. Damon does something crazy. Stefan hates himself in some form of fashion. Blah, blah, snore. Elena acts like it's something new every time. It's like wake up, your life's dramatic. Your boyfriend and his brother are vampires. What the hell did she think it was going to be?"

"Now Caroline," I said. "You know the truth only counts after ten o clock."

She shrugged. "I didn't get the memo."

Elena can never stay mad at Caroline for long, especially when Caroline just talked to her like she regularly does. While I agreed with everything Caroline said on more than one level, I hated to say that I also knew where Elena was coming from. She didn't see what I did, none of them had. It was a glimpse into who Damon really was. Something that he barely showed even now. The only person to really ever get anything out of him was Elena.

I wondered what that was like.

Damon, for what I understood about him, was the bad boy to Stefan's good. That was a very surface analysis of their characters, especially given Stefan's ripper phases and the fact that he'd forced his brother into vampirism, but it was still true. Stefan had emotional walls while Damon had the whole nine. Getting through the asshole exterior was one thing. Getting to know it in congruence with the good that was really in him was something different altogether.

It made me wonder who he really was.

Without his memories he'd still done a very Damon, as I knew him, thing. He'd gone to the most extreme option possible to get the attention he wanted, only for there to be some kind of psychological issue going on. Before he died, I could say it was petty Elena feelings that he didn't bother hiding. Post resurrection, it bordered on being the same self loathing Stefan had.

If not worst.

God, I hope not worst.

By the time lunch rolled around, Elena and Caroline were cool again and Matt was eating two sloppy joes. When Elena asked him what he thought about Damon going missing, Matt paused mid bite and shrugged.

"Is it Damon's month already?" he asked.

"You're not helping." Elena shook her head.

"Why did we break up again?" Caroline asked, genuinely confused.

"Because he found something better." Tyler sat down and kissed Matt on the cheek.

"He's just so fucking sexy." Matt said in a guilty voice. "He even growls sometimes."

"Really?" Caroline asked. "I've only heard him whimper."

"And see this," I pointed at the three of them. "Is why I don't eat with you guys."

"That and you hate Sloppy Joes."

"They're all over the place." I said.

"Like Jeremy isn't?" Caroline winked.

"Keep it cute, Blondie." I said.

Damon was staring in the window on the other side of the cafeteria. What made me notice him, I don't know.

I got up. "I'm going to the bathroom."

"Is that slang for doing Jeremy in the locker room?"

"He's still my brother." Elena said. "And they aren't even dating."

"Exactly." I said walking off.

I went in the direction of the bathroom and then jogged towards the double doors at the end of the hall. Once outside, I looked around and saw Damon turn a corner by the gym. I followed him around behind the school towards the bleachers. When I got there, he was sitting at the top.

"A church used to be here." He said.

I remembered hearing something like that awhile back, but I never cared enough to look into it.

I stood two bleachers down. "Where have you been?"

He noted my distance. "I haven't come to harm you."

"You can understand the precaution."

He nodded.

I asked him again. "Where have you been?"

He shrugged. "Here and there."

I nodded. "Did you kill anyone?"

"Would you kill me if I said yes?"

"No."

"Then answering that question is pointless isn't it?"

"Useless and pointless." I said dryly. "Way to make a girl feel special."

He looked shocked for a second and apologized. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"You didn't."

"You just said-"

"It's an expression, Damon."

"I know that." He said. "I still know lots of things."

"How so?"

"I mean, I have an idea of things. I know this is a football field, though I can't remember having ever been to a game."

"So it's kind of touch and go?" I asked.

"More go than touch, but yes."

"Do you remember anything after 1864?" I asked.

"No." he said. "It's like after drinking the blood that completed the transition, everything is white. I know words and phrases, though I don't feel the need to use them. My hunger is outrageous."

"So that's why you killed those people on the border."

"You asked a question you already knew."

"You avoided it all the same."

He shrugged. "Tell me something. You know this will get worse before it gets better. Why won't you do it?"

"If I kill you, it'll be the Damon I know." I said. "Killing you now just seems wrong. You haven't done anything the usual you wouldn't do…"

The look on his face made me regret saying it.

"Is that who I am?" he asked me, clear blue eyes focusing on mine. "I just kill people?"

"You've gotten better." I said. "Now you only kill people who get in your way."

"That's not better." He said.

Emily told me I had to help him to the best of my ability. The fact that her words just rang through my head told me this was one of those moments. I could shrug and walk away, or I could do what I said I would and try.

"Damon," I said. "I can sit here and tell you all the bad things about yourself, but I'm a little biased. You have to talk to the people who know you and who have seen the good."

"Like Stefan?" he shook his head.

"I was thinking Alaric." I said. "Maybe Elena?"

"No." he said quickly. "Not her."

"Is it because she looks like Katherine?" I asked.

"Any girl who chases death as much as she does can't give me the answers I'm looking for. From what I gather, me and you didn't get along and you can barely give me one."

He had a point.

"This Alaric," Damon said. "Are we friends?"

"To my understanding."

"Have I done anything to him?"

"You might want to get off that kick now." I warned. "You've done something to everyone."

Damon looked away.

"You're a part of the living, Damon." I said. "None of us are particularly nice to each other. You don't know half the things you've done. Are you really going to be upset about it?"

"That's just it. I'm not upset about it at all." He said. "I go from wanting to know things to not caring if I ever do. Killing those people last night was fun. I'd love to do it again. I probably will."

"That's not comforting."

He gave a slight tilt to his head. "It's the truth. I won't apologize for killing, I can only hope for death."

It was…weird.

He stood up. I braced myself. "Thank you, for the honesty I mean."

"No problem." I said.

He started to walk away. I stopped him. "You should really go back to the boarding house."

Damon turned. "And why is that?"

"It's your home too." I said, trying to do my best. "You have as much right to it as anyone else. There's enough space for you to have your privacy and-"

"Be close enough so that everyone can keep watch over me."

That too.

Damon walked back to me. "You know what I like about you?"

"What?"

"You're so honest." He said. "And not the obnoxious kind like the blonde one you were with this morning, but the rare kind that's both blunt and innocent at the same time."

I blinked. "Thank you, I guess."

"You're welcome." He continued. "So I have terms for you."

"Terms?" I asked.

"Yes. You want me back at the boarding house. Everyone does, if I'm not mistaken."

"You aren't."

"And I bet my brother wants you to do something regarding why I can't remember anything."

He was good. "Go on."

"I'll do those things, and even cooperate to the best of my ability, if you do something for me."

"I'm not killing you." I shook my head. "The answer's no."

"It is now," he said. "I wonder what it'll be when you're with me."

"What?"

"I want you to be with me every time I kill." Damon smirked. "Just you and me."

**A/N: Lol, hi.**

**First things first. If you aren't following me on tumblr, it's RoseGoldExiletumblrcom (insert dots accordingly) I've gotten a few followers and I do follow back, and I think it's a great way for all of us to communicate with each other. I can answer questions, join in on Bamon discussions, you name it, I'm there for it. **

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**So how did you guys like the Chapter? I'll be honest, I was iffy about it until the end. You guys know, if you're reading Effervescent, that I like to do the thing least expected or most expected but in a new way, so I thought this would be a completely different experience for Bonnie. She does want Damon closer to Mystic falls because of course it makes things easier, but also so that she can help him like Emily wants her to.**

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**If you haven't already guessed, Caroline and Matt are my two other faves. For some reason, I don't feel like there was enough "ex" tension between them and I don't know, I just think that since they had that and they are friends, they should interact more with each other.**

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